Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
