is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
