His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
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