My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize