she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
