it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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