The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
