If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
