idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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