it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
