There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Life without a bra equals bliss.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize