I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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