OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
