I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
