there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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