this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize