You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
