i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
