I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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