you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
