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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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