Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
