I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
