The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
