Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
