Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
