You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
