How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I think my moral compass just broke
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
