her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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