Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. đź’€
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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