I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
