i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
All I want is dick and wine.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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