I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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