she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize