Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
