I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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