yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
