eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
