ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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