Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
and you fell through a lawn chair
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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