i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize