then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
