Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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