i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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