So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
