what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
