Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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