i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
