is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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