Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize