We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
