There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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