S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
