You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
