I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
